Minecraft is evil!!!!

Well let me start off that this is not a let's blast minecraft blog. This is a let's blast myself for getting involved with this little known game LOL. See what I did there? I got you thinking what the hell is wrong with you John? Minecraft is known by everybody!!!!! So now that I have gotten your attention let's begin. About a month or so ago I was introduced to minecraft by a little 5 year we shall call her Rutabega to protect the weak. This young girl is a little PC prodigy, I mean seriously she uses mouse keyboard better than most adult gamers I know, its actually quite sickening. Well she started showing me this elaborate little house that she built in the side of a mountain. This thing was incredible it was like a maze she knew exactly where everything was and showed me her cows and pigs and trapdoors and maze like area. She is a genius I swear and will probably take over the world. So needless to say being a gamer I was kinda intrigued. Fast forward to about 2 weeks ago a few of my twitch friends shufflejump and crispytot got it for the PS4 and were streaming it. Now unfortunately I am not part of the cool crowd yet and don't own a PS4. So I vicariously live through them and my buddy Vip3r22 who doesn't play minecraft which hindsight being 20/20 I now know why. This damn game is addicting as pizza to a fat guy and trust me I am a fat guy, I know my pizza. Its more addicting as most drugs, trust me I did those when I was a lot younger. Its more addicting than sex to a sex addict. Well that I don't know really know about I just recently got married so being able to have sex when I want is new to me. Just take my word that Minecraft is addicting.

Ok since I don't have a PS4 I borrowed my sisters xbox 360 copy and powered up my xbox 360. So began the end of life as I knew it. Now you may ask why didn't you just play on the pc and stream it you big dummy.Well let me say I am not a keyboard mouse prodigy like my good friend Rutabega. I am a big fat old ranting guy that has sausage fingers so mouse keyboard is a little harder for me to work. I am more a console gamer. There are some games that I can play on but that's a blog for another time. OK where was I? Yes life as I know it ended. First off I did the tutorial and that was great way to get into the swing of things. After that I jumped into survival mode and oh my god was this a mistake. First let me state that if you haven't read my past posts I have what they call obsessive compulsive tendencies minecraft does not help curb these at all. Next thing I know I am tweaking out on a big hill figuring out how I am going to build my castle that overlooks the little town I found. Well there is a little cave area I dig to get cobblestone and when night falls I run to the town shut a door and hide till morning because zombies, skeletons, spiders, and these total douchebags called creepers come out at night. Now be warned I find this out way later that your villagers can get killed and they don't respawn in survival mode. DOH!!! Thanks for letting me know that you need to make sure the town is well lit if you don't want them to die. Oh and the douchebag creepers really like roaming up to townspeople and blowing up so you end up with giant holes every where that the pigs, cows, sheep, and chickens like to fall into then since they aren't the smartest animals on the food chain.They can't work their way out of a wet paper bag let alone figure out how to get out of a hole.

Alright so my village is a ghost town and my castle is in the process of looking sweet it has towers and an awesome looking front door cause of course I had to buy a few of the skin packs. I am very pleased that this 45 year old actually has an imagination and can build something. I then go and mine an ungodly amount of sand to make glass blocks and window pains for my next project (cue dramatic music) THE GLASS GREENHOUSE OF EVER IMPRESSIVENESS!!! All the while to my dismay my castle that I am so proud of that has been built on a hill is actually on top of a cavern that spawns douchebag creepers. Yep you guessed it I go into my castle on occasion and before i can even react I here the most annoying sound in the world. This is worse that babies crying worse than finger nails on a blackboard worse than your significant other tell you about their day while you are watching football. Ok let me get sidetracked here for a second to just say "I am sorry honey I was just typing to make people laugh I enjoy your stories and I LOVE YOU, you are sooooo pretty". Ok back to the story I hear this most annoying noise which sounds like a fuse being lit and then BOOM!! A bit of my castle is blown to smithereens. What the hell!!! Ok no problemo I can fix this which I do and go about creating my greenhouse. I finish said greenhouse and bask in my awesomeness that I created a thing of beauty. How the 2 pigs and cow got in there still remains to be seen but what the hel,l it's awesome. Until I am roaming around doing other things and didn't see Sir Douchebag around the corner of said greenhouse at night and SSSSSS BOOM!!! The whole corner is wiped out after a rage quit and a few tears it is fixed and now I am completely hooked on this game.

Well I could go on but I think I have bored you enough with this rant/story. In closing if you haven't played minecraft I won't blame you or call you names but in all honesty it is a blast. It can be played by the whole family at one time which is pretty awesome and the replay value is really good. You can't deny the global phenom know as minecraft. It is a true game that lets your imagination run wild. Besides survival mode, which is what I play due to the fact I like the challenge because you have to level and mine everything you need to build. There is a creative mode where everything is unlocked and you can seriously let your mind go crazy. I haven't tried that yet in fear of nobody ever seeing me again. Oh, I forgot got to mention in survival mode you can FISH. How cool is that?

Well everyone have a great day and remember FISH ON!